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So, last night's episode of Bravo's the Fashion Show—this season's fourth—opened with House of Nami power-bragging about their winning streak and invincibility. Meanwhile, Emerald lamented their poor luck and the fact that they really needed to pull it together and, like, win something. We all know what that means, right? All together now: Nami finally lost; Emerald finally won.
The challenge was, well, kind of convoluted—and announced at the American Museum of Natural History. Each individual designer was to select a time capsule representing a surprise, seminal year in history. Were they actual time capsules or did Bravo interns whip these up with whatever scraps were hanging around the office? We have no idea but it's probably more likely the latter. Whatever: Everyone had to design a distant future-appropriate ensemble inspired by the era represented by the individual time capsule while incorporating plaids and designing for the collection. We think. Like we said, it was kind of convoluted.
Rolando choked: He showed poorly-pleated Lanvin for Mad Men when his year was frizzy, fancy-free 1969. He was sent packing. Meanwhile, Jeffrey showed a paneled sort of half and half something dress that we liked but aren't entire sure how to explain. He won (over Cesar who created two dresses (one of which was a kite-shaped cartoon nightmare, but still ?))
And now, our top ten moments from episode 4:
10.) The way Isaac Mizrahi pronounces capsules—let's just say there's an extra syllable floating around in there. And we like it.
9.) Eduardo: "So you're thinking it's the year 3000 we're all going to be wearing plaid?" Um, absolutely yes. And Rolando: "No-one wears plaid now." Lies. Meanwhile crazy Calvin gets the importance of plaid. He and his "group of trendy friends" in Vietnam just loved it.
8.) Speaking of Calvin, how is it that he is like the fun and happy and sassy court jester drag queen who everyone just loves now but two weeks ago he was basically Lord Voldemort? And, yeah, he was tramping around in his finished skirt—which we actually liked, and pumps.
7.) Rolando over-designed and ended up in over his head—and everybody knew it (Calvin, before calling it horrendous: "If you can do it than hallelujah to you.") It got so bad that he literally had to go to the other side of the room to get away from his form ("I don't wanna look at it right now.")
6.) Usually those little vignette whatevers Bravo plunks into the middle of the third or fourth commercial break to create the illusion of brevity are pretty terrible. Last night's, however, centered around an Intervention-style missing wine opener emergency. What? You can't relate?
5.) Can Jeffrey never stop impersonating Lil' Kim? Thanks.
4.) Omigod, sad hipster Dominque's flirt session with token straightster David: Holy awkward. We wanted it to stop so hard and it just never did. And sad hipster really likes him—you can totally tell.
3.) It wasn't so much that we enjoyed Iman's remark that something had "a homemaker under the influence vibe"—trust, we didn't. What we enjoyed was the Eduardo's laugh—almost definitely in response to some other joke. It was sort of haltingly edited in place to make Iman seem funny. It didn't work.
2.) Oh god: David's "cringe-inspiring" slouchy astronaut jumpsuit with those terrible, terrible lapels. While bad, his sad, insipid explanation about being inspired by his grandmother and Michael Jackson (What?) was worse. Overly-emotional and spineless and don't think that his behavior didn't profoundly affect Dominique (she hearts him more majorly than he hearts her). She stuck up for him (compounded embarrassing) and confessed later that she "shouldn't have to be the man of the house." Uh, don't tell your cats that.
1.) Isaac on "the dress of Jeffrey" (heaven forbid he just call it Jeffrey's dress): "I'm going to copy this dress. If you see this dress in my collection in the spring you know from whence it came."
Bonus: The Real Housewives are in the house next week!