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Two idiots—sorry, but, that's what they are—decided that a back-to-school "Shop With a Cop" event at a Fred Meyer store in Portland, Oregon, would be the ideal time to shoplift. According to The Oregonian, two men were arrested for stealing blenders, shoes, clothes, and tools while more than 60 uniformed police officers were in the store for the schoolchilden's event. Police Sargeant Pete Simpson says that the two men believed that cops would be too distracted by the children to notice thieves. [AP]