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Last night's episode of Bravo's the Fashion Show was full of surprises—quirky-fabulous vintage, Simon Doonan, Calvin's rarely-witnessed humanity, Eduardo producing pants, and a runway show that had judges scrambling to deem a worst because everyone presented their best (if, in Dominique's case, her best equals a totally heinous, ill-fitting, pig-faced (seriously) swing coat fashioned from craft store felt—which is a distinct possibility).
Meeting Iman at New York Vintage—fabled Manhattan clearinghouse for vintage red carpet looks and designer inspiration—designers were each given two oddball accessories to inspire them. Each designer was to design two looks for fashion's eccentric glamorpuss—with Jeffrey and Cesar reuniting as House of Emerald and Eduardo, Dominique and Calvin designing for Nami. Emerald's all-white collection came out on top, with Jeffrey winning a little piece of New York Vintage to help along in his next challenge and some bonus spending money for his final collection. Eduardo was sent home for being consistent—or dull, we suppose; as Calvin actually produced two beautiful dresses the judges didn't skewer and Dominique lucked by with her pig-coat and hunch-dress being just weird enough for the panel to transcend utterly terrible (we disagree).
And now, our top ten moments from episode 8:
10.) Let's just get this out of the way so we can get back to funny: Calvin, if he wins, intends to donate his prize to the Gay Men's Health Crisis (GMHC). He's been with his partner for ten years; said partner only has a few months left—and GMHC has helped him through a lot. He cried! There's a human person in there!
9.) Back to life as usual: Once again Calvin talked a lot of shit about Eduardo's beautiful if expected devotion to ruffly party dresses: "Here we go ruffle," "ruffle, ruffle, ruffle ?"
8.) "The hungry ruffle can be your signature." Laura Brown is sick of Eduardo's ruffles, too.
7.) All that said, Calvin expected a win. Team emerald had everything it takes to bring home the gold: "We got ruffle, we got hunchback, we got pig."
6.) So the hunchback? Dominique used an antique bustle to create a growth-like hump effect on the dress she created. It was gross. The pig? Inspired by a Judith Leiber-esque evening bag in the shape of a dumb, gross, jeweled, pink pig—Dominique very literally popped a pig face on an ugly coat. She was utterly delighted with herself, oinking about the studio asking every which person if they thought it looked like a pig. Isaac Mizrahi liked that she took a risk but called it "kind of hasty pudding, rushed through, a visual joke." We just threw up in our wineglass.
5.) Jeffrey adds a syllable to caftan. We're okay with it.
4.) And his sheer delight at seeing all that crazy vintage—adorable. The crazier the better: He ended up wearing that Dior feather shawl around.
3.) Simon Doonan on eccentric glamor: "Without eccentricity, fashion is just boring clothes." (Also, if anyone knows anything about that printed mandarin-collared blazer with the crazy print that Doonan wore to the runway show, please share the wealth.)
2.) Cesar on his collaboration with Jeffrey: "We're the two little gay birds nurturing our eggs." Kind of yuck.
1.) Double yuck! Iman, as she dismissed Cesar and Jeffrey: "Get some rest. In separate beds!"