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Molly Shannon on the Perils of Wearing Wrap-Around Shorts

Racked is no longer publishing. Thank you to everyone who read our work over the years. The archives will remain available here; for new stories, head over to, where our staff is covering consumer culture for The Goods by Vox. You can also see what we’re up to by signing up here.

Comedy writer Bonnie Datt once bought a chainmail vest "for clubbing"—a purchase she later came to lament, once she realized that chainmail isn't terribly slimming. Inspired by this, she now spends her spare time asking famous people to dish about purchases which they initially loved—but ended up regretting, for Racked's regular feature, Buyer's Remorse.

Photo credit: Getty Images

Comedian Molly Shannon, best known for her hilarious performances as Saturday Night Live's Mary Katherine Gallagher and Kath & Kim's Kath, is absolutely fearless when it comes to delving into her characters' most uncomfortable traits. It's one of the many things we love about her comedy. For this week's Buyer's Remorse, Molly is equally brave and candid with us, sharing a tale of a teenage purchase that went mortifyingly wrong.

So Molly, tell us about your greatest case of buyer's remorse...

Molly Shannon: Once when I was a teenager I bought these wrap-around shorts. I thought they were so chic. You kind of put them on like a diaper, then tie them around your waist—tying front and back strings. Well, I was wearing the shorts at this outdoor shopping mall one afternoon, and I was running to catch my bus. I was so relieved when I finally did, indeed, catch my bus. However, I was mortified when I discovered that my wrap-around shorts had completely fallen off one hundred feet away, and I was just standing there in front of everyone with just my underwear on. So I had to get off the bus and then run all the way back to where the shorts had fallen off, and then slowly, in front of a lot of people—all watching and giggling—slowly wrap and tie them back around me. Ugh! Can you imagine?
· All Buyer's Remorse Posts [Racked]