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Patti D'Arbanville's Gold Marc Jacobs Boots, "I Want to Lick Them"

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Racked is no longer publishing. Thank you to everyone who read our work over the years. The archives will remain available here; for new stories, head over to, where our staff is covering consumer culture for The Goods by Vox. You can also see what we’re up to by signing up here.

Comedy writer Bonnie Datt once bought a chainmail vest "for clubbing"—a purchase she later came to lament, once she realized that chainmail isn't terribly slimming. Inspired by this, she now spends her spare time asking famous people to dish about purchases which they initially loved—but ended up regretting, for Buyer's Remorse.

This week, we speak to actress and Racked reader, Patti D'Arbanville, our only Buyer's Remorse participant to have had a song written about her by Cat Stevens. As an actress, Patti has appeared in everything from Andy Warhol's Flesh, to The Sopranos, to Guiding Light, to Entourage, to Rescue Me. She was even in one of our all-time personal faves, My So Called Life. But when it comes to shopping, obsessing over purchases and regretting them...she's one of us.

Racked: Patti, what purchase were you initially excited about but eventually ended up regretting?

Patti D'Arbanville: I was looking on Gilt, where I buy a lot of my outfits and shoes, and I saw Marc Jacob's boots—flat, gold leather boots, like riding boots, but gold. They were drop dead gorgeous. I got so excited, I went off and put another tab on, to check my bank account, but by the time I got back to the site, they were out.

So I was crazy. I looked all over the internet: Amazon, then Rue La La, then I went to Beyond the Rack and The Sample Sale—I went everywhere—because sometimes they have Marc Jacobs on other sites the same day. And nothing. The boots that I had seen were $500 and I didn't want to spend $500 when I had just seen them for $129, thank you very much.

I was despondent and I dreamed about these boots for weeks. I kept looking—I went everywhere, any kind of Marc Jacobs sale they had. And every store I went into, I'd see clothing and think, "Oh my God that would look so great with the gold boots." I even went to H&M to look for gold things to wear with the gold boots, when I eventually found them again.

So one day I'm looking on Ideeli and they have the Marc Jacobs boots! And I jump on it. I buy them in an eight and in a seven and a half, because you just never know... So they come and they're gorgeous and I'm beside myself, frothing, I want to lick them they're so pretty. And finally I decided on the eights. Because I figured when I wore them it would be a little chillier out and I'd wear heavier socks. So I sent the others back.

And now I have my size eight Marc Jacobs gold leather boots. And that was two years ago. And to this day, I have never worn them. Not once. Not with anything. Not even naked alone in my room. Never put them on again.

· Patti D'Arbanville [Official Site]
· All Buyer's Remorse Posts [Racked]