VIDEO: We Smash Things With Vogue's Heffer of a September Issue

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Just In case you missed our major super-amazing round-up post on all the monster September issues this weekend, well, word on the street is that the gigantor September issue of Vogue will finally hit newsstands tomorrow, August 23rd. We just got ours here at Racked HQ and, as expected, it's a heffer.

To bring you the full September Vogue heffer experience, we decided to use it to smash things. Yes, you read that right, smash things. And we took video of the smashage.

The breakdown:

"That's certainly how I've come to think of cover girl Kate Moss's wedding, which took place in early July near her wonderfully charming and unpretentious home in the English Cotswolds" —Editor-in-Chief Anna Wintour

Cover Girl: Kate Moss

Her hair color: Blonde

What she's wearing: Alexander McQueen

Photographer: Mario Testino

Biggest integer on cover: 758

Number of pages: 758

Other thing that has around 758 pages: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

Ad pages: 577

Without ads, it would be: 181

Number of pages before actual content: 218

First ad inside: Ralph Lauren

Number of animals in issue: 23

Materials needed: Vogue September Issue, things to smash

CONTESTANT #1: Plastic Cup, Before

Live action VIDEO of September Vogue being dropped on plastic cup from a height of about 3 feet. What will happen!? The suspense is killing us.

Plastic cup, after:

VERDICT: Unsurprisingly, Vogue totally owned the plastic cup. Crushed it, killed it, gave it wrinkles.

CONTESTANT #2: Goldfish, before

Live action VIDEO of September Vogue being dropped on a pile of cute little Goldfish snacks from a height of about 3 feet. What will happen!? The suspense is killing us.

Goldfish, after:

VERDICT: Following impact, remnants of the scraps of goldfishes on the Missoni for Target back cover. No grease spots, though, which was impressive. * No actual goldfish were harmed in this act of senseless destruction.

CONTESTANT #3: Chow Mein Noodles, before

Live action VIDEO of September Vogue being dropped on Chinese takeout Chow Mein noodles from a height of about 3 feet. What will happen!? The suspense is killing us.

Chow Mein Noodles, after:

VERDICT:We may have underestimated the strength of these chow mein noodles. Although some noodles were crushed—most of the chow mein remained intact. Rematch next year, same place, same time. Bring it, Vogue —David Chen
· Vogue [Official Site]
· The September Issue Breakdown: Height, Weight, Animal Cameos [Racked]