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Guys. GUYS! The Spice Girls are Back

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We've interrupted our nostalgia-induced re-visitation of the entire '90s girl power super group's oeuvre on Youtube to bring you the news that the Spice Girls are back!!! Well, sort of. In honor of a new London stage musical, Viva Forever!, inspired by their three albums, the girls reunited to snap a photo in front of the staircase that launched their careers in 1996 (we refer you to the "If You Wanna Be My Lover" video after the jump). Will this deja vu never end? We hope not, Baby Spice. We really do.

But while in many ways they're still the same ol' Spice Girls we know and love, they've also grown up. They're less '90s-fied, of course, but also (excuse the blasphemy) less Baby, Scary, Sporty, Posh, and Ginger. Which means now is as good a time as any to reconsider those nicknames in light of who the Spice Girls are today. Our analysis, after the jump.

Sporty Spice, we dub thee Platinum Card Spice.
Gone are the sad tennis shoes and over-sized Adidas shirts. Gone are the sports bras and high kicks. And welcome to the gorgeous white sheath with a sneaky slit up the middle.

Posh Spice, you are now Beckham Spice.
Oh, Victoria. You've come so far with a apparel and handbag collection all to your own, a hubby and kids, and a relocation Stateside. Why do you have to stand and look angry like always? You are Victoria Beckham, now and forever.

Scary Spice, you get to take Victoria's nickname of yore.
In lieu of those man-crushing platforms and the suggestive animal prints, the grey number is fitting of nothing but Posh Spice. Congratulations.

Baby Spice, you're still Baby Spice.
If you were American, you'd get the name Sorority Spice, but you're not. You are, however, still adorbs and everyone still wants used to want to be you in karaoke. There can only one Baby Spice and it is you.

Ginger Spice
You abandoned the group and shall never be forgiven. Why were you even invited?

· The Spice Girls Reunite To Launch The New Musical "Viva Forever!" [Buzzfeed]
· All Victoria Beckham Coverage [Racked]