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The Academy Awards are always a lengthy affair, but with Seth McFarlane's questionable host script last night, this year's Oscars seemed especially interminable. The patient were rewarded, however: the gowns held their own against the Golden Globes and the Grammys, and the big moments of the evening were truly memorable. So in case you missed it, or just blocked out what the heck happened over those three-plus hours, we've got you covered. Here's a rundown of the seven most important things that happened at the ceremonies. —Jihan Forbes
Quvenzhané Wallis was best dressed
Hands down, Quvenzhané Wallis had the illest red carpet look. The nine-year-old Beasts of the Southern Wild actress hit the event in a sparkly Armani frock, completing her outfit with one of her beloved puppy purses. Little Q's pup was also gussied up for the occasion in a powder blue tutu and tiara. It was enough red carpet cuteness to make up for some of the rest of what was to come.
Helen Hunt wore H&M
In a sea of Dior Couture and Armani Privé, Helen Hunt went against the current, choosing an H&M gown for Hollywood's big night. But accessible fashion does have its limits. The actress kicked the look up a notch with, oh, $700,000 worth of jewels, in case you forgot she's rich and famous and jewelers like to lend her stuff.
The theme fromJaws served as the 'wrap it up' music
This year, the Academy wanted to let all the Oscar Winners know they were really not playing when they said they wanted to keep the show as short as possible. Instead of coaxing verbose winners offstage with the customary swelling orchestra music, the show's producers instead opted for the ominous-sounding theme song to Jaws.
Shirley Bassey sang the hell out of "Goldfinger"
Very few singers can upstage Adele, but when Shirley Bassey was called upon to lend her vocal stylings for the Academy's tribute to 50 years of James Bond movies. The 76-year-old singer proved that she's still got it, blessing the nation with a powerful rendition of the theme song to 'Goldfinger' (or 'GoldfinGAH,' as she sang it.)
There was a tie for an Oscar
The Academy couldn't decide if Zero Dark Thirty or Skyfall had better sound editing, so they gave the Oscar to both films.
Life of Pi won big
It was a good night for anyone who worked on Life of Pi. The film snatched up a total of four Oscars for Cinematography, Best Director, Visual Effects, and Original Score. Now, to go and actually see the movie...
Jennifer Lawrence fell
As an end to her very eventful awards season, Jennifer Lawrence tripped on her Dior couture gown (we're seeing a pattern here) and fell up the stairs on the way to accept her Oscar for Best Lead Actress. Then she got a standing ovation, and thanked the room at the podium saying, "You guys are just standing up because you feel bad that I fell...and that's really embarrassing, but thank you!" So, not only did Lawrence snag up a huge award, but she also provided us with one of the most endearing Oscars acceptance speeches ever.
Michelle Obama introduced the nominees for Best Picture
In an unexpected twist, First Lady Michelle Obama was chosen to introduce the nominees and announce the winner for Best Picture via satellite from the White House. She wore Naeem Khan and looked awesome, and frankly it was the least the Academy could do for us after three hours of Seth Macfarlane.
· Oscars 2013: J Law's Big Dress, Jennifer Aniston's Big Rock [Racked]
· All Awards Season Coverage [Racked]