7 Places To Shop for R-Rated Valentine's Day Presents From the Privacy of Your Computer

Racked is no longer publishing. Thank you to everyone who read our work over the years. The archives will remain available here; for new stories, head over to Vox.com, where our staff is covering consumer culture for The Goods by Vox. You can also see what we’re up to by signing up here.

Maybe you and your numero uno are looking to mix things up this Valentine's Day. Maybe you've decided you're a big kid, and you deserve big kid toys. Maybe you're concerned that the greatest sexual discovery you've made this year is—gasp—you've been wearing the wrong bra size this whole time. Whatever the reason, the internet has your Sex Shop Solution. Come exploring with us, and try not to worry: We promise to keep the Fifty Shades of Grey puns to a minimum. We can't say the same for these sites.

1. Liberator: Great shopping experience.
No lo-fi interface making you feel smarmy here; Just a massive range of products on a polished and easily navigable site, like a slightly naughtier Shopbop. You can search by price (under $25 included!), apparel, toys, sexy furniture, books, oils, and much more. They also have a surprisingly wide variety out latex outfits, if you had a hankering to get your Britney Spears-circa-1999 on.

2. Lelo: The Rolls Royce of vibrators.
Sleek, internationally renowned, and expensive. Lelo has one dubbed "The Most Exclusive Vibrator Ever Created." It's made of 24k gold and costs $15,000. Non-precious metal toys, however, start at $50.

3. Kiki de Montparnesse: For high-brow fun.
Find everything from elbow-length leather gloves to lingerie, corsets, and matching sets to whips and blindfolds. Price points are steep, but so is the sexy factor.

4. She Bop: Female friendly (but all sexes and genders welcome!)
Based in Portland, Oregon, She Bop pride itself on being a safe space for women, but not women-only. They also make a point to promote safe and, when possible, eco-friendly sex. But all of that doesn't mean they scrimp on the range of products: You can still find a wide range of BDSM accessories, couples products, video, and solo toys. And if you're in the area, the shop hosts multiple classes and workshops (with links to the educators' sites should you not live nearby).

5. Coco de Mer: Great for fun extras.
There are nipple tassles. There are "erotic home wears." There are animal masks. We're not totally confident that we know what those are for, but would consider ordering around Halloween for that mouse costume. Also, there's cute lingerie, scarves, and the usual toys. In short, Coco's great for gag gifts and gags, depending on what you're in the market for. Note: Ships from the UK, so be ready to wait.

6. ScreamingO: Your one stop shop for cheap thrills.
They have glow in the dark, multicolored, animal-shaped, and an entire range of vibrators that look like make-up all for under $15. Head here if you want to try toys but aren't ready to invest.

7. Babeland: The mecca.
Besides all manner of sexytime accessories you could dream of (yes, including "eco-sex toys"), the site caters to both the I-have-no-where-to-put-shoes-since-my-closet-is-also-a-toy-chest and vibrational newbs. Find tidbits like a gift guide and a "which vibrator is for me"-type quiz as well as a bondage box kit. Only drawback is that it can be a tad expensive.

For more non-skeevy sex shops around the country, check out our guides to Philly, Boston, Chicago, San Francisco, and Los Angeles.

· The 10 Best Lingerie Boutiques To Shop Online [Racked]
· The Ultimate Guide To Finding Cute Workout Clothes Online [Racked]

Racked Video Archives: Behind the Scenes of a Lingerie Photoshoot