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Bravo is pitting the Rachel Zoe Project (season 5) and It's a Brad, Brad World (season 2) against each other on Wednesday nights. It's Fashion's Night In, people! We at Racked are keeping score and will crown a winner each week before naming the champion of Bravo's fashion block. May the best fashionista win.
The Rachel Zoe Project
The episode opens in New York, the morning after Rachel shows her collection at Fashion Week—reviews are positive and buying appointments are going fairly well (even if Rachel's favorite pieces are a tough sell). After checking in on a new project—the DreamDry salon—Team Zoe returns to LA to show off their growing, glitzy company, complete more buying appointments, and to style a holiday music video for Coach and flash-in-the-pan singing-theater-nerd group Karmin.
It's a Brad, Brad World
Meanwhile, Brad and Company spend their whole episode in New York: They style Petra N?mcová for a Diesel fashion show and a charity event; swing by Christian Siriano's runway show; share a semi-awkward get-to-know Gary dinner; and Thomas oversleeps and almost gets fired for not delivering an outfit to an unnamed client.
TRZP: Rachel, sitting on the floor of her closet (above), waxing poetic over a vintage Chanel briefcase she bought when she leased her first office so she could be "all business-y." She also interrupted Rodger to ponder the craziness of some Alexander McQueen prints.
IABBW: Does all the Louis Vuitton count?
Winner: Obviously Rachel
Best Awkward Moment
TRZP: Rachel trying so hard to play it cool and keep it breezy and quick at the Nordstrom buying appointment (below) while in reality she is a rambling loon and the Nordstrom team is silently dying.
IABBW: "Nasty harassment" is the term Brad & Company coin for Brad's incessant need to talk about bodily matters with his employees. This is at the dinner table (above).
Winner: Brad, because there's a sitcom writer involved
Best New Catchphrase Possibility
TRZP: "Maje" continues; "literally" has resurfaced.
IABBW: "Next level" debuts; Brad slips in a "literally" of his own.
Winner: Rachel, for consistency
Best Crisis Management
TRZP: "I just feel like I don't know what to do so I need to put on a fur hat (above) or something."
IABBW: "I'm going to take a bit of a breather because today's been a little intense for me."
Winner: Rachel, for making it funny
TRZP: Rachel returns to work in LA wearing a dark fur coat with massive shoulders and a huge collar as well as an over-sized hat that splits the difference between a bowler and a cloche. It was a little Cruella de Vil—in a good way.
IABBW: Another Louis Vuitton jacket—this one varsity-style; with neutral chinos and electric turquoise lace-ups.
Worst Celebrity Appearance/Brand Combo
TRZP: Karmin—remember when Karmin assaulted our lives for 15 minutes last year? Last night the "hipster/coolster" band were shooting a holiday video for Coach. Did anyone not have to leave the room when the duo "sang" at Rachel's styling studio?
IABBW: Brad newest client is model Petra N?mcová—gorgeous and gracious but ? Who? And he styled her in Diesel for Diesel's fashion show.
Loser: Karmin trumps almost anyone, minus one for Rachel
Best '90s Moment
TRZP: Rodger and his assistant uncovering photos of a very young Rach-and-Rodger complete with very '90s hair.
IABBW: At New York Vintage, Brad queens out over a slew of archive-quality '90s Versace including some spangled bustier bra-tops and a silver python dress that he practically tries on.
Winner: '90s Versace—obviously Brad
TRZP: On her new styling assistant: "I'm so happy to have like a New York fashion bitch."
IABBW: Hannah was majorly girl-crushing on Petra and Brad wonders if "a toe was just gently tapping the lady pond." Later, the second time they dress the model, Brad asks a flannel-clad Hannah: "Did you dress a little lesbian today?"
Winner: Ha, Brad
Best Mid-commercial Moment of Ridiculous
TRZP: A montage of Rodger trying on all the Coach stuff and not having a clue while Rachel scolds him for said cluelessness and the entire staff ponders how someone like Rachel could've ended up with someone who doesn't know how to operate a scarf.
IABBW: Brad gushes over Christian Siriano at his fashion show.
Winner: Rachel, by default
Best Pop Culture Moment
TRZP: "If these fashion walls could talk."
IABBW: "I'm the Terminator of fashion."
Best Moment of Vanity
TRZP: Rachel already hates looking in mirrors and "these bangs are really confusing" her.
IABBW: After someone compliments Brad's outfit: "Thanks! What do you like about it?"
Winner: Brad, for owning it
Best Freak Out
TRZP: When buyers make it clear they can't stock Rachel's favorite pieces, including various floor-grazing maxis, Rachel basically loses it: "Glad I wore it" (AKA what a waste); "This is fashion bullshit!"
IABBW: Thomas, who does often seem excessively tired, overslept and didn't get a look to a client in time. Brad is giving him one last chance but he was panicked and is pissed.
Winner: Fashion bullshit
TRZP: 6 points, minus one for knowing Karmin
The (totally unscientific and subjective) Winner of Fashion's Night In Week 2 is there is no winner! It's a tie. Rachel still takes the overall lead after winning last week, though.