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Bravo is pitting the Rachel Zoe Project (season 5) and It's a Brad, Brad World (season 2) against each other on Wednesday nights. It's Fashion's Night In, people! We at Racked are keeping score and will crown a winner each week before naming the champion of Bravo's fashion block. May the best fashionista win.
The Rachel Zoe Project Recap: Last night Rachel and Rodger (and Pam and Skyler) hit Paris for the shows—Rachel ended up voiceless and Rodger with hives. They went to Louis Vuitton ("That was an experience. That was a show. That was extraordinary ? That was so emotional ? I still can't talk about it. I don't think I can talk about it. Let's not talk about it ... I can't talk about it anymore."), Valentino ("Everytime I go to a Valentino show I get kind of emotional."), Chanel ("Every Chanel show is like the first time."), and a few others. They previewed a Van Cleef & Arpels exhibit where Rachel caught up with some shiny old friends she's borrowed for past awards shows. They also met with their international sales representative—who can sell those editorial pieces Rachel is so committed to. At the end they stopped by Montaigne Market where the couple gushed over two mannequins wearing the Rachel Zoe Collection. Throughout Rachel contemplated the direction of her line.
It's a Brad, Brad World Recap: Meanwhile, in Brad's world: Brad and Gary are planning a big move and it's going to be tight (they also have to address Brad's hoarding tendencies). On the professional front, Brad spends a good chunk of the episode with Rashida Jones, dressing her for talk show appearances and some film festival stops. After that, Brad and the gang style a shoot featuring Connie Fleming, a transgender nightlife personality and model, doing her First Lady fiercest for transsexual style magazine Candy.
TRZP: Wow: Rachel on a carousel is something else. Terrified of germs and in shock that the ride rotates more than once, she's falling all over the place, screaming about vertigo, and utterly convinced she will not survive: "I'm going to die get me off of this!"
IABBW: Inspired by a billowy Philip Lim gown, Brad educates his staffers on dancer Martha Graham before Martha Graham-ing the dress across the office, twirling and flowing.
Winner: Brad, for sure.
TRZP: Rachel was just not having helping Rodger get dressed for one of the shows. She barely looked up at him; told him one outfit looked like he was about to go to temple; and wrapped it all up with a "that shirt looks like it cost $3."
IABBW: Regarding his runway walk: "I really only need a tune-up."
Winner: Rachel, her ease of bitchiness remains impressive
Best New Catchphrase Possibility
IABBW: "Wowie kazowie!"
Winner: Brad, obviously.
Best Celebrity Appearance
TRZP: Rachel greets just about every designer post-show: We see her gab with Marc Jacobs, Karl Lagerfeld, Giambattista Valli, Nicholas Kirkwood, and Elie Saab.
IABBW: Brad spent quite some time styling Rashida Jones—they're buddies and "style twins" who both aim for edgy "geek/chic." Okay.
Winner: Rachel, but by a hair.
TRZP: Rachel's giant gold belt buckle that first day in Paris; a huge, glimmering, open oval. Amazing.
IABBW: Brad's gross little gold sneakers in his studio; glittering—maybe sequinned—and definitely dated.
Winner: Rachel, she looked great
Loser: Brad, those were inexcusable, minus 1.
Best Totally True Statement
TRZP: "Parisians—they are just perpetually chic."
Winner: "You cannot do anything in this business without a good tailor; you need a good tailor!"
Winner: Brad, that statement is fact; there have to be at least a few un-chic Parisians.
TRZP: When Rodger asks if Montaigne Market is on Avenue Montaigne, Rachel is like, "duh," and, "Sorry, you ask a dumb question you get a dumb answer."
IABBW: "If I was gonna do drag I would call myself Business Casual."
Winner: Brad, that's a great drag name.
Best Mid-commercial Moment of Ridiculous
TRZP: A café moment in Paris—Rodger wants something bigger and messier and greasier; they have no time; Rachel (in crazy electric blue bell bottoms) has to photograph him eating quiche.
IABBW: Some crazy person dressed as Jesus wanders through the photoshoot and Brad declares: "He looks like he's wearing like Celine! A Celine tunic!"
Winner: Brad. It was funnier.
TRZP: Rodger gets hives or some other rash or pock-like something early on in the Paris trip. Rather than, you know, attend to him in any real way she shrieks: "Don't touch my coat! Louis Vuitton and red dots aren't a good combo!" Later: "Take a Benadryl ? Is that cold?"
IABBW: Regarding the transsexual fashion shoot: "You do understand we're about to make fashion history?"
Winner: The colder the better. Rachel.
Best Bizarro Moment
TRZP: There were a few moments in last night's episode where Rodger declared his excitement over happenings he clearly is not excited about. The most absurd: His limp anticipation for the Elie Saab show.
IABBW: The first two or three minutes of the episode featured Brad unabashedly gushing over how great his ass looked in a certain pair of jeans.
Winner: Rachel, for dumping someone who'd go on and on about his perfect ass on camera.
Best in Excess
TRZP: Rachel packs seven huge suitcases for Paris, not including a small army of tiny Louis Vuitton carry-ons. Included are "six furry black jackets" and a number of items with the tags still on them. Rodger is incredulous and Rachel just asks "What?" Once in Paris, after Givenchy sends Rachel all kinds of things to wear over the course of her stay, she admits that maybe she could've packed less. Chances are she will not pack any less next time.
IABBW: So, Brad and Gary are moving which means the duo have some major packing to do. To do so, Brad has to come out of his eBay-addict/almost-hoarder closet: His side of the garage is packed with boxes filled with antique chairs, dog beds, "vintage espresso cups," damaged lamps, room diffusers, stuff from Hermès, and "vintage Pierre Cardin playing cards." Gary is not happy.
Winner: Another tight one—but Rachel for getting a bunch of Givenchy out of it.
TRZP: 6 points
IABBW: Only 4 points
The (totally unscientific and subjective) Winner of Fashion's Night In Week 3 is Rachel! Rachel has the overall lead after winning week 1 and last week's tie. To be fair, though—there's a lot more time for great moments in Rachel's hour than there is in Brad's 30 minutes.