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Coachella kicked off Friday with the usual beats, sweaty nipples and lots fringy flower things. Racked photographer Driely S. is reporting from ground zero, and by reporting we mean making sassy comments on Instagram. To wit: "When Jared Leto arrived yesterday you could actually hear the sound of the Tweens ovaries ripening. I am considering licensing all my street style photos of Jared Leto babe-ing at Coachella to fertility doctors as a way to induce ovulation." [Ed. note: "Tweens" is Driely's way of describing anyone who attends Coachella, not actual 11-year-olds.] There are also quite a few underbutts and still—still—with the headdresses. Follow her desert wanderings below.