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Crucial Update

Katy Perry's H&M Christmas Commercial Is Doing a Whole Lot

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While the rest of the world was stampeding each other for a shot at Balmain x H&M, Katy Perry was busy practicing to star in brand's holiday campaign. Though the print ads, which featured Perry wearing various H&M holiday items emblazoned with sayings like "Elfie Selfie," debuted earlier this month, last night the world got a first look at the actual commercial, as well as her first-ever Christmas song.

Let's table the shocking revelation that Katy Perry has never recorded a holiday song for a moment and instead focus on the insanity of this commercial. For one, it starts like this:

And only gets weirder from there.

There's also waving.

Lots of waving.

And Left and Right Shark were replaced by Left and Right Teddy Bear:

At one point this terrifying little boy shows up, never to be seen again.

Although most of the most memorable facial expressions are Katy Perry's own.

See:

Even more horrifying, however, is this animatronic polar bear:

For real though, what is happening here.

Literally what.

Watch the whole thing below.