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Taylor Swift has just given the internet a gift in the form of a long note titled "To Apple, Love Taylor." The post on her Tumblr explains why her album, 1989 won't be available on Apple's new streaming service when it launches in June—a pretty serious deal. That said, the note can alternatively be read as a diplomatic breakup template from a woman who has been on every side of the heartbreak coin. Here, the simple tweaks needed to repurpose Taylor's letter for your own relationship-ending needs.
1. Wherever you see the word "Apple/Apple Music" insert the name of the individual you'd like to cease arrangements with.
Example: I feel this deserves an explanation because Apple 'Harry Styles' has been and will continue to be one of my best partners.
2. Wherever you see the word "album" change to "relationship."
Example: This is not about me. Thankfully I am on my fifth album 'relationship' and can support myself.
3. Wherever you see the word "company" change to "human."
Example: I find it to be shocking, disappointing, and completely unlike this historically progressive and generous company 'human.'
And finally, after you've removed all mentions of payment and 3-month trial period, celebrate your breakup with the girl gang of your choosing.