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Crucial Update

Amy Schumer’s New Boyfriend Is a Hot Furniture Designer

@benhanisch/Instagram

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Amy Schumer, a smart, funny professional writer who lives in New York City, has a new boyfriend named Ben Hanisch, who is a furniture designer. We're going to ask you to table (sorry) the screaming voice in your head shouting, "Sex and the City! It's like Sex and the City!" for now and direct your attention to this:

Photo: @benhanisch/Instagram

It is a table that doubles as a swing set, which Amy Schumer's new boyfriend designed, and it is the greatest invention in the world.

He also makes other kinds of non-swinging tables, like this one:

Photo: @lastworkshop/Instagram

Or this conference table:

Photo: @lastworkshop/Instagram

And this 17-foot media console:

Photo: @lastworkshop/Instagram

There's this credenza:

Photo: @lastworkshop/Instagram

And finally, another table that doubles as a swing set:

Photo: @lastworkshop/Instagram

All of this beauty is now yours, Amy Schumer — as long as you don't pull a Carrie.