All I Want to Do Is Tuck My Hair Into a Turtleneck

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About five years ago, I saw a “micro-trend” story on a fashion blog about tucking your hair into your turtleneck, and I’ve been trying to get the look ever since. And I mean that in the most earnest way possible.

I’m not the only one who’s noticed this is a very cool look. Vogue, Man Repeller, Elle, W — everyone has written about this being “a thing” in some capacity. Some of these articles even include tips on how to recreate it yourself. (I’d save you a click and tell you how, but you can probably figure it out on your own.)

Clothing brands have also caught on. Many of the stores I frequently shop at have photographed models for their websites in turtlenecks with their hair tucked in. Here is the turtleneck tuck at H&M. And Zara. And Madewell, Aritzia, and & Other Stories.

Everlane Wool Sleeveless Turtleneck, $110

Everlane Cotton Double-Knit Turtleneck, $80

And you know what? It works on me every single time. I will buy any turtleneck that leads me to believe I, too, can have this Olivia Palermo-approved hairstyle that’s one part IDGAF and one part I Care So Much. The notion that your hair and your sweater should work in tandem with each other is both equally lazy and extremely high maintenance. And that is me in a nutshell.

For example, I bought this Ribbed Wool Turtleneck from Everlane because of the turtleneck tuck. This one, too. The sleeveless version, also styled with the tuck in all three color options, is in my shopping cart.

Wilfred Free Lin Sweater, $135

Wilfred Free Lin Sweater, $195

I don’t even like this one from Zara, but am more compelled to buy it over this one because the styling team opted not to wedge the tip of this model’s ponytail into her shirt. How can I see how effortlessly cool and great I’ll look with the turtleneck tuck if the model isn’t wearing it herself? Like, this woman is perfect, and I want to be her.

I’m pretty sure that the reason I keep falling for this is that I still haven’t been able to figure out how to actually get this look. It’s somehow not as simple as just pulling your sweater over your head and then doing nothing else. You have to have the right amount of volume and texture and a few wispy strands framing the face. (Olivia Palermo apparently uses clear elastics to get the perfect pony.)

Zara Ribbed Sweater, $39.90

Zara Ribbed Sweater, $39.90

Basically, the turtleneck tuck is the clothing equivalent of no-makeup makeup, in that you do indeed need a lot of makeup to pull it off.

At the end of the day, I just don’t think I have the right hair for it. It’s too thick, too bluntly cut, not wispy enough. There’s a small part of me that wants to take this photo to my hairstylist and point: “This one, please.” Until then, I’ll just buy all of these and hope for the best.

Watch: Every woman on TV has the same hair