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Crucial Update

Cooler Canadians That Should've Been at Last Night's Canada State Dinner

Photo: Kevin Mazur/Getty Images

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Last night's Canada state dinner brought out Canadian famouses like singer Sara Bareilles, Grey's Anatomy actress Sandra Oh, and writer of the internet's best/worst dad tweets Ryan Reynolds. Nothing against these fine examples of Canadian talent, but on behalf of our northern neighbors, dare we suggest (in the politest possible manner, of course) that the coolest president in history could have selected some cooler Canadians?

It's not that they don't exist; Canada is the birthplace of the 6 God himself, after all. Though we can't say for sure whether or not the following people were in fact invited and simply weren't able to attend, here's a guest list suggestion for the next time the White House attempts to make Canada appear exciting.

Note: Justin Bieber wasn't there, but in retrospect, that was probably a good call on Obama's part.

17. Alanis Morissette

Kind of ironic that she wasn't there, no? A little too ironic?

16. Dave Coulier

Photo: Ron Galella/Getty Images

Despite being probably the least cool person on this list, it's important never, ever forget that it was Uncle Joey who was the impetus for "You Oughta Know," the best karaoke song of all time.

(Note: Dave Coulier wasn't actually born in Canada, but his mom was, and his hometown in Michigan is on the border. This, along with being the subject of Alanis Morissette's best song, counts.)

15. Ryan Gosling

Conspiracy theory: Ryan Gosling wasn't invited so that Prime Minister Justin Trudeau could continue being the most handsome man the room.

14. Pamela Anderson

Photo: George Pimentel/Getty Images

Pamela Anderson would obviously wear this evening gown interpretation of the Canadian flag should she have attended the state dinner, which is reason enough to invite her.

13. Ellen Page

Is there a cooler celebrity than Ellen Page, Canadian or otherwise? Gay rights activist, feminist, dates a surfer who's also an artist?

12. Shania Twain

Photo: George Pimentel/Getty Images

Did it just blow your mind that country singer and the '90s incarnate Shania Twain is Canadian? SAME.

11. Grimes

Photo: Fiona Goodall/Getty Images

Nothing says, "I'm not a regular dad, I'm a cool dad" like having Claire Boucher play "Kill V Maim" at your state dinner.

10. Celine Dion

As the literal opposite of her fellow Canadian Grimes, Celine could swoop in with something to comfort the olds.

9. The Weeknd

Think about it. You could finally ask him why his face always looks the same.

8. Chad Kroeger and Avril Lavigne

Photo: Michael Tran/Getty Images


7. Deadmau5

I would bet nine thousand dollars Barack pronounces it Dead Mow Five, and the world deserves to hear that.

6. Seth Rogen

He's reportedly in talks to produce a film adaptation of Where's Waldo. Perhaps a reasonable conversation with Barack Obama could convince him this is a bad idea.

5. Carly Rae Jepsen

Photo: Todd Williamson/Getty Images

Criminally underrated Carly Rae Jepsen is the only person in the world still trying to pull off Joan Jett hair, and it's time she gets recognized for it.

4. Michael Bublé

Hard to say whether anyone actually sang the Canadian national anthem last night, but you know Bublé would have killed it.

3. Drake

Photo: Karwai Tang/Getty Images

Reason for invite unnecessary.

2. Jacob Tremblay

He was the cutest kid in Room, and is also the cutest kid in pretty much all other rooms.

1. Jacob Tremblay's Hot Parents

Photo: Gregg DeGuire/Getty Images

Is there a more shining example of the wholesome, comically attractive regular Canadian family than the Tremblays? There is not. Because they're surely far too polite to ever ask for an invite, consider this a formal request for next time.