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Come, Hear Tell of the Horror That Was Jennifer Garner's Oscars Dress

Photo: NBC/Getty Images

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Things men must undergo before attending the Oscars: get a haircut, maybe a spray-tan, shave a little, and throw on a tux. The most agonizing part of all that miiiight involve watching a "How to Tie a Bow Tie" tutorial on YouTube. Things women must undergo before attending the Oscars? Surgery, basically.

Last night on The Tonight Show, Jennifer Garner told the story of how she managed to squeeze into — or rather, was squeezed into by a small army — her one-of-a-kind Versace dress.

"See how I have a waist right there?" she asked, pointing to a photo from the Oscars red carpet. "I don't have one in real life anymore."

She explained plainly: "What they do is they move your organs around."

Do continue, Jen!

"There are basically two men who come in with screwguns, and they screwed me into a metal corset — €”this isn't true, but it was a metal corset and it did take two Italian people. The next thing you know, my ribs were compressed. It's very intense. It's not like Scarlet O'Hara. There's metal inside and these people just kind of move your ribs and they move your liver out of the side and they pop you in. To keep you in place, you step into a bodysuit first, which is like the bottom of a leotard, but it's a thong."

Hear the rest of the story (it involves her having a giant muscle spasm in the middle of the awards show) in the clip below.