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Attempt to Navigate the Labyrinthine Logic That Is Miley Cyrus' Latest Instagram

Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images

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Like many great celebrity tirades, Miley Cyrus' most recent one started out championing a noble cause (International Women's Day), but ended up including one of the more offensive terms used to describe women. This afternoon, she wrote a mini-essay directed at all parties involved in the aftermath of Kim Kardashian's latest naked mirror selfie and the backlash that followed. Let us walk — nay, carefully tiptoe — through it together.

But first, the necessary background: Yesterday, a handful of celebrities (Chloë Grace Moretz, Piers Morgan, Bette Midler) criticized Kim Kardashian on Twitter for sharing another mostly naked photo of herself. This, of course, was followed by the celebrities who responded to the response (Bella Thorne, Abigail Breslin), which they said merely boiled down to slut-shaming.

In what is most surely not the final death knell for the situation, Miley writes:

Dear women, you ALL are acting tacky AF! Why don't we overly (myself included) fortunate women come together and try to create and bring jobs to other women in desperate need of them so they can support not only THEMSELVES but their families! #happyinternationalwomensday can we all put the cuntiness aside for one fucking day and love / celebrate one another! PS no matter how hard you (or myself) work NEVER will I feel I am worthy of the comfort I live in.... Because so many others while I tuck myself in at night are laying their head on the pavement, dreaming of all the things we take for granted every day. Much love to all my women!!!!

Happy International Women's Day to you too, Miley!

Update: Kim Kardashian responded to the backlash with a post on her website, in which she asks why being a good role model can't involve being proud of her body, how Kanye empowers her through unconditional love, and the subject that still comes up 13 years later.

On the latter subject, she writes:

It always seems to come back around to my sex tape. Yes, a sex tape that was made 13 years ago. 13 YEARS AGO. Literally that lonnng ago. And people still want to talk about it?!?!

I lived through the embarrassment and fear, and decided to say who cares, do better, move on. I shouldn't have to constantly be on the defense, listing off my accomplishments just to prove that I am more than something that happened 13 years ago.

Let's move on, already. I have.

She then ends the open letter with a call to end slut-shaming:

It's 2016. The body-shaming and slut-shaming — €”it's like, enough is enough. I will not live my life dictated by the issues you have with my sexuality. You be you and let me be me.

I am a mother. I am a wife, a sister, a daughter, an entrepreneur and I am allowed to be sexy.

If you're a subscriber, you can read it in full on her website.