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It is now the second half of 2016, a point at which the choker — like a necklace, but less comfortable — should by all measures be the butt of D-grade jokes about Coachella.
After years of build up, the '90s nostalgia trend has reached such a level of ubiquitousness that it’s been dude-ified, tripled up, mommy-and-me’d, and even (reluctantly) worn by Taylor Swift. There is, at this point, nothing left for the choker to do except disappear.
Despite endless pronouncements that this has already happened, most notably from trend czar Alexa Chung, chokers mysteriously continue to swath themselves around the necks of not only on Who-lebrities like Cassie Scerbo and that one group of girlfriends from back home who were kind of mean in high school, but on actual, incredibly famous and trendsetting celebrities.
So today, July 15th, we will set the clock at zero.
In our lightning fast-fashion system, there is virtually no chance whatsoever that such an omnipresent accessory could continue to be relevant by midnight on December 31st, 2016. At some point in the next five months, chokers will no longer be a staple of important celebrity events like Gigi Hadid’s 21st birthday party, and instead make up the clearance section at Forever 21.
But today is not that day. On Wednesday, July 20th, cool model Emily Ratajkowski wore one, along with some fake bangs:
And on July 18th, cool teen Sophia Richie wore one on Instagram:
The same day, incredibly famous supermodel Miranda Kerr wore one out in LA:
Photo: Fame Flynet
And on July 14th, Kendall Jenner wore a choker at the opening of Skyspace LA:
They all looked nice! Chokers: still a thing, for now.
Stay tuned for more important choker-related updates as we attempt to determine when, precisely, the choker will finally free society’s collective neck.