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Is This a Thing: Letting the Scarf Wear You?

Instead of you wearing the Giorgio Armani scarf.

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Today, Giorgio Armani showed his fall 2017 collection featuring sentient scarves (??) that are done with our bullshit. Is this a thing?

Model in Giorgio Armani’s fall 2017 show Photo: Victor Virgile/Getty Images

NO.

For the most part, men are hesitant to go beyond the basics. Even when it comes to ties, men refuse — and are pressured to keep the resistance up — to try anything that isn’t the simple four-in-hand knot. How are they possibly going to follow the inevitable guides to wearing clothing like a Giorgio Guy? They’re not.

That’s why you have models wearing these scarves (or are they cardigans??) totally dysfunctionally. Here’s what went down, 100 percent, absolutely, no doubts: Giorgio (or Georgio, in honor of Kim Kardashian) provided models with one of those impossible-to-follow drawings with step-by-step instructions and they all got caught in the clothing. It’s a textbook case of the item wearing you, instead of you wearing the item. Either that, or the dawn of sentient clothing is upon us and this piece is their leader. Or maybe this guy just wanted to bring back the way we all wore hoodies in middle school.