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This bag came out today, and I want it. It’s red and shaped like a circle and has two fucking pom-poms on it that the brand describes as “like a personal cheerleader!” It looks like something you would give a doll as a prop.
And now I hate myself.
Until today, I had never heard of the brand Ban.do before, but a Twitter link to Hello Giggles brought me here, staring at a photo of the goddamn pom-pom bag. However, according to my far-more-informed coworkers, Ban.do is a thing that people know. Here are the ways it was described to me:
“It’s sort of brunchcore but in a more permissible way?? Maybe???”
“It’s like ‘I LIKE NAPS AND NETFLIX AND MY OTHER BOYFRIEND IS A NACHO.’”
“Like Urban Outfittersy but more cute.”
“Infantilizing yet #relatable.”
“Part of me thinks the #slogans are made up by a room full of old white men trying to sound like a 13-year-old girl.”
“It makes me feel uncomfortably pandered to.”
See? You get it.
Anyway, I still want this bag. And yet it turns out despite the above, most Racked employees also secretly long for a certain Ban.do item. Here are some of them:
Alanna: The “Work It Out” Exercise Mat
Meredith: The “Get It Together” Backpack
Julia: The Silver Light Up Sneakers
Cory: The Pastel Raincoat
But seriously, on a scale of 1 to 10, how much should I hate myself? Also, should I buy the bag?