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I’m the proud owner of this Gap culotte jumpsuit, an item of clothing that combines two things I strongly dislike into one I absolutely adore.
How did I end up here? I was playing a private game of retail dress-up, in which I try on outfits specifically because I think they’ll look terrible. Slowly but surely, I’m building an impressive collection of unflattering photos of myself wearing everything from illusion mesh to a velour bodysuit.
But instead of giving me a monster wedgie and drowning the lower half of my body in fabric, as I’ve come to expect from jumpsuits and culottes, this culotte jumpsuit looked good. Like, really good. So good that I would probably live in it if I didn’t feel societal pressure to change my clothes once in awhile.
The structured bodice means the small-chested among us can comfortably go braless, and the nipped waist and loose fit of the pants made a chic contrast, not clownish proportions. With all the benefits of a dress — a look instantly created with just one piece of clothing that makes me look polished and like I tried — it also has all the benefits of sweatpants, in that I can go home, collapse on the sofa, and contort into my weird Netflix-watching position. Now that it’s on sale some sizes are dwindling, but this similar version, with a zip down the front, is still fully stocked.
I’m confident I’ll also be able to wear it in the colder months with ankle boots and a cardigan. Oh, and it has huge pockets. Why would I ever want to wear anything else?